When an aging parent owns a home, that property may represent much more than a place to live. It may be the family’s largest financial asset, a source of security, a potential resource for future care, and an important part of the family legacy. That is why decisions about whether to sell, downsize, remodel, age in place, or move into senior living can become complicated very quickly.
In this two-part conversation on Answers for Elders, host Suzanne Newman talks with Cory Boldroff, a Certified Senior Real Estate Planner who helps families navigate real estate decisions before, during, and after major life transitions. Through his work with The Complete Real Estate Group and Complete Senior Solutions, Cory takes a broader view of senior real estate—one that considers the older adult’s home, finances, care needs, estate planning, family relationships, and long-term goals.
The conversation also tackles a difficult reality: aging adults can become vulnerable to financial exploitation, manipulation, and family conflict. For adult children, the challenge is learning how to protect a parent without taking away their independence or imposing their own values. As Cory puts it, the goal is to be an aging parent’s advocate, not their parent.
Senior Real Estate Planning Is About More Than Selling a Home
One of the most important messages Cory shares is that senior real estate planning shouldn’t begin with the question, “How much is the house worth?” Instead, families should ask: What is the best overall solution for this person and their future?
A traditional real estate transaction may focus primarily on preparing a home for sale and finding the next property. But older adults may have many other considerations. Could the existing home be modified to make aging in place safer? Would in-home care make staying home financially practical? Would moving closer to family provide better support? Could a garage or another part of the home be converted? Would downsizing create unexpected tax or financial consequences?
Cory describes his approach as “empowerment through education.” His goal is to bring families their options so they can make an informed decision rather than pushing them toward a particular transaction. He shares an example of a family that initially wanted to sell a father’s home. After looking at the situation more closely, however, they discovered that the home could be retrofitted, a grandchild could move in, and a relatively small amount of in-home care could make staying there financially practical. The family ultimately decided that remaining in the home made more sense.
Cory’s response is an important lesson for families: giving people options isn’t the same thing as talking them into—or out of—a sale. That broader perspective is especially important because senior housing and real estate decisions often overlap with estate planning, trusts, probate, capital gains, downsizing, relocation, caregiving, and legacy planning. Cory emphasizes the value of having a trusted network of professionals who can work together rather than making every transition feel like starting from scratch.
Aging Parents and Real Estate: Consider the Whole Picture
For an older adult, the family home can be both an asset and a challenge. A house that has worked beautifully for decades may become difficult to navigate as mobility, health, or cognitive needs change. That doesn’t automatically mean it is time to move.
Aging in place may be the right answer for one person, while downsizing or moving closer to family may be better for another. The important thing is to consider the decision in the context of the individual’s entire life—not simply the property’s current market value.
Cory’s work emphasizes planning ahead for these possibilities. He discusses the importance of understanding estate plans, trusts, powers of attorney, medical and financial directives, living wills, and other documents that can become important during a crisis.
This kind of preparation can make an enormous difference when an unexpected event occurs. Instead of siblings scrambling to figure out what Mom or Dad would have wanted, the family has already had those conversations.
And those conversations aren’t only about money. Families should talk about questions such as:
- Where would you want to live if you could no longer safely live alone?
- Would you prefer in-home care or a senior living community?
- What would make you consider moving?
- Who would you trust to help manage your finances?
- What happens if dementia or Alzheimer’s disease changes your ability to make decisions?
- Who should speak for you if you cannot speak for yourself?
- What matters most to you about your home and your independence?
These aren’t easy questions. But asking them while everyone is healthy and calm is far easier than trying to answer them in the middle of a crisis.
Protecting Aging Parents From Financial Exploitation
The second part of the conversation takes a more sobering turn as Cory discusses financial exploitation of seniors. He shares a story about an older woman whose home had fallen into extremely poor condition while members of her family had repeatedly taken substantial amounts of money from her. Cory helped her move to a safer situation and sell the property. After the sale, she had approximately $429,000 in net proceeds.
But the story didn’t end there. Her children gained access to her new bank account using the same password she had used previously. They took the money from the account and also accessed her Social Security income. When she contacted Cory, she was facing foreclosure and told him she hadn’t eaten in three days.
Cory ultimately helped her consider alternatives, including a life-estate arrangement that allowed her to remain in her home. More importantly, the experience changed how he viewed his responsibility to the families he serves. He realized that helping someone through a real estate transaction wasn’t necessarily enough; families may need support and planning well beyond the closing table.
The story is a powerful reminder that financial protection is part of aging planning. Older adults may face scams from strangers, but exploitation can also involve people they know and trust. Cognitive decline can make someone especially vulnerable to manipulation, while family disagreements can create additional pressure.
That doesn’t mean adult children should take control of everything. It means families need safeguards that protect an older adult while respecting their choices.
How Adult Children Can Be an Advocate, Not a Parent
Perhaps the most meaningful lesson from the entire conversation is Cory’s distinction between being an advocate and being a parent. When adult children become caregivers or advocates for aging parents, it can be tempting to make decisions based on what they believe is best. But the adult child’s values aren’t necessarily the same as the parent’s.
Suzanne illustrates this with a deeply personal story about caring for her own mother. Suzanne wanted her mother to walk because she believed walking was healthier and safer. Her mother, however, felt more comfortable and secure in her wheelchair. Later, Suzanne realized that she had been imposing her own values instead of understanding what her mother wanted.
That distinction matters enormously. Being an advocate means asking questions, understanding preferences, identifying risks, and helping a parent make informed decisions. It doesn’t necessarily mean making every decision for them.
Sometimes the most helpful question isn’t, “How do I convince Mom to move?” It’s: “What is it about staying here that matters so much to Mom?”
Maybe it’s familiarity. Maybe it’s independence. Maybe it’s the neighbors, the garden, the memories, the feeling of control—or simply the fear that moving means giving up the life she knows. Once families understand the why, they can begin looking for solutions.
Start the Conversation Before a Crisis
One of the strongest themes throughout this two-part Answers for Elders conversation is the importance of planning ahead. Real estate decisions, caregiving decisions, estate planning, and financial protection shouldn’t have to happen simultaneously during an emergency.
Families can start with small conversations. Talk about the home. Talk about future care. Talk about financial responsibilities. Review estate documents. Discuss who has authority to help if the parent becomes unable to make certain decisions.
And perhaps most importantly, ask the older adult what they want. Cory encourages families to think beyond the next year or two and consider the broader aging journey. The goal isn’t to predict exactly what will happen. No family can do that. The goal is to have enough planning in place that when circumstances change, everyone has a roadmap.
For older adults, that can mean greater security and a greater sense of control. For adult children, it can reduce uncertainty and family conflict. And for the family as a whole, thoughtful senior real estate planning can help preserve not only financial assets, but also relationships, dignity, independence, and legacy.
Watch on YouTube
Part 1. Senior Real Estate Planning: More Than Just Selling the Family Home
Part 2. How to Advocate for Aging Parents Without Taking Away Their Independence
Listen on Apple Podcasts
Frequently Asked Questions About Senior Real Estate Planning
What is senior real estate planning?
Senior real estate planning takes a broader approach to real estate decisions involving older adults. Instead of simply asking whether a home should be sold, it considers options such as aging in place, home modifications, downsizing, relocation, estate planning, financial considerations, caregiving needs, and legacy goals.
Should an aging parent sell their home or age in place?
There is no single answer. The right choice depends on the person’s health, safety, finances, preferences, support system, and the condition of the home. As Cory explains in the interview, families should consider all available options before deciding that selling is the best solution.
How can adult children protect aging parents without taking away their independence?
Start by understanding the parent’s wishes and values. Be an advocate rather than simply taking control. Ask questions, discuss future scenarios, create appropriate financial safeguards, and make sure important legal and estate-planning documents are in place.
How can families prepare for dementia or Alzheimer’s?
The conversation recommends addressing future care and decision-making before a crisis occurs. Families can discuss where an older adult would want to live, what type of care they would accept, who they trust to help them, and how financial and legal decisions should be handled if their ability to make decisions changes.
Why is senior real estate planning important for family wealth?
For many families, the home is one of their largest assets. Decisions involving a property can affect taxes, care costs, inheritance, family relationships, and the ability to transfer wealth to future generations. Looking at the entire financial and family picture can help ensure that a real estate decision supports the older adult’s long-term goals rather than addressing only the immediate transaction.
