Crossroads

This segment describes ways that unscrupulous house flippers and investors can take advantage of seniors. They're looking to get deals, to purchase a property for less than market value. But if you're 80 years old, hard of hearing, with family living out of town, and a flipper visits you using some of these strategies, it's disgraceful. Rebecca Bomann joins Suzanne to provide ways to offset this and protect yourself from these tactics.

This hour focuses on ways that senior homeowners can be taken advantage of during the process of selling their home. This is the sale of their biggest asset to be able to pay for their care for the rest of their life, which they may have lived in for many decades, and the biggest financial transaction of their retirement years. Rebecca Bomann, CEO and founder of SASH Services, joins Suzanne to delve into this important topic for senior homeowners as well as their family members and caregivers.

How should money be spent during a senior loved one's move? It's very emotional and sensitive time, with parents and their adult children having different perspectives and agendas. Adult children are worried about the parents' money lasting long enough for their care. They worry that they might have to mortgage their own home in a few years to pay for their Mom's care. Unless parents have set aside a nest egg, it's a concern because the cost of care is so high that proceeds from a home sale might only pay for care for a handful of years. Sometimes they don't want their parent to sell the home because they expect that home to be there for them when their loved one passes away. Meanwhile, what's best for Mom in her situation?

Who helps Mom through the sorting, packing and moving process? Everyone is well-meaning. Some Moms expect that their adult children will take four months' leave from work to go through every box, glass, and cross-stitch, remembering back to when family did that for each other. Yet many of today's adult children can't imagine how they'd be able to take leave from their job, travel out of state, and pay for a flight to sort through decades of household items – they're overwhelmed by that idea, and it causes tension in the relationship.

Adult children and their aging parents have wildly differing perspectives on moving. This segment builds a bridge to understanding each others' perspectives when it comes to the senior loved one's pet, which befuddles many adult children. Adult children are thinking of a monthly budget, trying to make funds last as long as possible, and are concerned about how that's affected by an animal's daily care, walks, feeding, medication, and vet care. Mom, however, sees the pet as a family member who gives joy, love, companionship, and comfort.

When it's time for a senior loved one's downsizing, their adult children may not quite understand or relate to the parents' perspective earned from living 50 years in their home as they see more pragmatic concerns about home repairs and time-consuming chores, and want to schedule moving deadlines based on available free time. Rebecca Bomann, the CEO of SASH Services, and Suzanne Newman talk about how to do right by our parents while helping them transition from a long-standing residence in their home to senior living.

Once you've got Mom settled in her new senior living community, you still have to go back and sort through the rest of her things. This segment talks about three piles you need to make while sorting through her things: sell, donate, trash.

Kelley talks about how the conversation often goes, when Mom first sees a potential model unit. You know she'll need a couch, bed, table and chairs, nightstand — no brainers. But she sees no room for the things that matter to her. If her little crystal animals are that important to her, find a way to bring them. It's not whether she uses it or not, it's something that connects her to something she loves. The move itself is traumatic enough, so be kind and listen to what she wants. Honor her for who she is; it's important to her. Have those conversations with the community. The more people share, the more the community can help.

This segment focuses on beginning stages, and putting the plan in action. First: we're downsizing for a reason, whether Mom is moving in with an adult child, moving into an assisted living facility. Look at the space she's moving into and assess how much space is available. Visit model units to get an idea of what would work in the space, to see if Mom's couch will actually fit.

Kelley talks about how we can help our parents and ourselves so we don't leave a lot of clutter for our own children to deal with. When a family member downsizes from a 2,000 square foot home to a 900-1200 square foot retirement apartment, or to an independent living or assisted living apartment, now you're looking at 500-700 square feet of space, or smaller depending on the apartment. You have to weigh what's important to keep, and it will be home — you want to bring your things so it feels like home. Many people in a home look at the challenge and don't even know how to begin downsizing. If you have a senior loved one, or have mobility issues, it can seem an overwhelming challenge. This hour will talk about how to begin, and what to expect regarding amenities when you move into senior living, and how can you leave a legacy for your community.